I love my dad, like most daughters do. Some would call me a "daddy's girl" but I love my mom too, in different ways. It's just that my dad has a lot of qualities that I would want in my husband. He's patient, funny, kind, very intelligent, hard-working, social, active, a great provider, a great father, a loyal husband...I could go on and on. He's my hero.I have just survived an intense week of my dad being in the hospital. It changed all of us. None of us will be the same. My dad has congestive heart failure. His heart beats faster than it's supposed to and if it is not controlled, water will build in his lungs making it difficult for him to sleep or breathe. He hasn't had proper sleep in the past week. He lost a lot of weight in the hospital. My mom and I lost a lot of tears and probably aged a bit from all the worrying, as well. I thought I was going to lose my dad. I still think at times, I'm not sure which is better: letting him go so that his suffering could end or keeping him alive on medication for his heart, his blood pressure, his anxiety, etc. But I truly prayed. I had not prayed in a long time. I asked God to make a decision for us but whatever decision it was to let us have the strength and the peace to endure it. He's home from the hospital now. I guess God and my dad's will, my mom and my prayers, along with everyone else's kept my dad alive. It's just that he's not the same. He's not all there anymore. I worry more about him wondering if he's getting sleep, getting rest. I'm trying to check in and talk to him more, see him more, but I also have to live my life, somehow through all of this. I will be there someday too. I love my dad and I miss him too. He is not as strong and sharp as he used to be. He has become the child and I have become the adult. It is my turn to take care of him.
In that week that I was in the hospital, it made me think a lot about life and the value of people, of experiences. Life is really shorter than we realize and passes us by very fast. It's important that we learn to treasure every second we have.
I have no regrets in my life. I have many fond experiences that have taught me so much.
and yes, I truly do love and respect my dad.
